Saturday, June 27, 2009

boys are confusing...
especially analytical ones!

Gill and Skippy

I never posted here that I got a fish. His residency was located on my desk at the University of Phoenix. His name was Gill and I hearted that fish very much. He was grumpy but cute. Well, I had my co-worker feed him for me and apparently on Monday morning when he came in, Gill had passed away. The guys knew I would be sad so they quickly ran out to replace my little betta. When I finally made it to work on Monday, I was not in the best of spirits... I missed my weekend get away and did not want to be back in Arizona! So- my cube mate, Dave, informed me Gill had died and I now had a new fish. I didn't want a new fish that day. I wanted to be sad Gill had died and sad I was home away from 'him' and sad that I was missing Paula. I wanted to be mad at the students who were dropping classes, angry that work had been stressful, and frustrated with the homework I had left to do that night. Mostly I just wanted to go home.

Now, deep down it brought me joy to know those guys at work cared enough to go get me a new fish because they didn't want me to be sad. They cleaned out Gill's home so the new fish wouldn't get sick. It even took them quite awhile to find just the right fish for me. How sweet is that!?

By Tuesday, the fish did not have a name. And Wednesday, I didn't go to work. But Wednesday night with the help of Ryk, we came up with a name for the fish. His name is Skippy. As of Thursday morning, Skippy and I began to bond. I still miss Gill but I'll say this much... Skippy is definitely NOT as grumpy as Gill. Maybe Gill was just sick from the day I brought him.

In loving memory of Gill
1/24/09 - 1/21/09

Sunday, June 14, 2009


So it has been awhile since I posted and honestly, there is not much to discuss. It seems like my life is pretty much consumed with work and school. As much as I hate school, I love it too. You can say I have a love/hate relationship with my education. This program has brought me to a place were I have more confidence in myself and has really helped me grow in my professional life. Each day, I seem to have more of a sense of direction of where I want to go. Not that I know exactly but I am getting there.

June brought me to my 37th year too. Life is amazing. Of course there are ups and downs and I look back on situations I have overcome. I was having a conversation today with someone 10 years younger than me. She mentioned she had ended a long relationship and I realized she was just a year older than I was when I got divorced. Sometimes it amazes me to say I am divorced because I am to the point were it feels as if I was never married. That time in my life, I thought my life had ended. Everything I wanted was "taken" from me. Being married, a wife, having a family. Over the next several years, I struggled and it did not get easier for quiet awhile. But I can honestly say how much better off I am now.

July will be 10 years since my divorce.

June is 5 years since Paula passed away.

Had I not gone through my divorce, I would never have met Paula. I've always been thankful for my divorce because it led me to a friendship that most never experience in their life. I wonder what this year will bring me because there seems to be a trend in major events in my life. Maybe the experience is just coming to a point in my life were I start to take control of everything and put it all together...

We'll see...

If you are reading this, more than likely you are someone who has been there over the last 10 years of my life. I am thankful for your friendship, whether we talk every day or hardly at all.

Life is good...